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Trading carrots for chocolate pudding since 2012.

Sift Through the Brainstorm Debris – 8.14.12

(By TheWayIsHere)

I decided it wasn’t fair for YetiVedder to have all the bullet-point fun, so I reckon I’ll join in on the fad.

What will you find in this weekly list? I have no freaking clue, but I’m sure it will all be deep and profound.

* Hey Wendy’s, can you please stop shoving this friendless ginger down my throat? I don’t care about your fresh salads, bacony burgers or value meals… just keep this psycho away from me. She’s like a god damn red-headed ninja. Woman just appears out of thin air in grocery stores, at yard sales and even in the back seat of cars.

* What is it with old dudes just posting up in lawn chairs on their driveway? Do they enjoy watching traffic that much? I guess when you get to a certain age, you just say, “Fuck it, I’ve done everything I want to do in life. I’m going to sit here and stare at passing cars.”

* Duct-tape Bowser. The biggest understatement of the century would be to claim this bro has way too much time on his hands.

* Whenever I start to lose faith in mankind, I just think about this: As long as there are ladies and gentlemen out there willing to toss salads and tongue-punch brown stars, we’re going to be okay. To have that much faith in another human’s bowels is a true testament to our ongoing struggle to evolve and thrive. Hell, I don’t even have that much confidence in my own bowels.

* I can’t even describe how much I dislike Bobby Valentine. I hated when the Red Sox signed him last winter, and I hate him even more now. The smugness and arrogance he emits while making absolutely inane managerial decisions makes my blood boil so much that I’ve all but stopped watching the Sox this summer. I wish he was chomping on his gum in somebody else’s dugout.

* Being unemployed still sucks.

* The excitement I have for the upcoming football/fantasy football season can only be compared to the excitement and anxiety one feels about a baby being born. For some excellent fantasy advice, surf over to DavidGonos.com – guy knows what he’s talking about!

* Prediction time… New England Patriots 2012 record: 13-3. My fantasy team’s 2012 record: 5-8.

* The NBA is a joke. Now that there are 3-5 super teams, why would the rest of the squads even bother showing up? At this point, it’s worse than baseball and its lack of a salary cap. The Nationals, Pirates, A’s, Orioles and Giants are proof that the MLB system can still work, though I’m not a huge fan of it. Try telling players on the Toronto Raptors, Charlotte Bobcats or Sacramento Kings that they have a chance in hell at success.

* Was anybody else actually rooting against the USA men’s basketball team? I can’t be the only one who wanted them to lose. And no, this year’s team would not have a chance against the 1992 Dream Team.

* This is an interesting list talking about the 10 “unhappiest” jobs in America. With our country’s unemployment rate still ridiculously high, I’ll speak for all of us jobless folks: Fuck you and the job that makes you so miserable.

* I love summer, but I can’t wait for fall.

* Banger of the Week: What It Is To Burn by Finch

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3 Comments on “Sift Through the Brainstorm Debris – 8.14.12

  1. dustin
    August 14, 2012

    remember flo from progessive? same shit different company. a red head who is a 4 at best somehow translates to smoke shows in the media. not sure how that works but im seeing the pattern.

    beer + lawn chairs = all males destiny. at some point either we either raise our glasses or the white flag. or both.

    fuckin hate valentine, it’s just a well salaried job for him. at least tito actually gave a shit. since leaving NE i got a better perspective on the carpet bagger esque nature of the franchise. if they really cared about the fans it wouldn’t cost 2 weeks pay for the average dude to take his sons to a game. this problem isn’t unique to boston but bro, $40 to park? seriously? thats unique for sure. gotta be.

    i like the pats prediction. even more so that our “division rival” now has 2 quarterbacks that cannot throw. oh that’s right, i went there jets fans. come get me.

    nba is fix city, and trust me, i hate conspiracy nut jobs. once tim donaughy was let out of FEDERAL FUCKING PRISON i think it was a clear indication some sketchy shit went down. then the book came. its a great read, whether it’s fact or fiction still good shit.

    1992 Dream Team – 125
    2012 Olympic Team – 101

    With 1:38 left in 4th quarter. Is what the outcome would look like. Bird just rainin 3’s on Bronbron.

  2. blucowboy
    August 14, 2012

    I mean, you get me a beer and a buddy and I’ll sit on that fucking driveway all day looking at shit. Also, you don’t want the friendless ginger? Send her my way, I’ll fuck the soul right back into that bitch!

  3. Charles
    August 15, 2012

    Even if Magic Howard played in the Olympics this year, this team still wouldn’t have a chance against the 1992 team. The win over Spain wasn’t so convincing. Gasol was raking rebounds and the dream team had barely any inside game. I did hope they would lose at least one or two, just so the 2012 vs 1992 discussion would be put be put to bed.

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