Trading carrots for chocolate pudding since 2012.
* I never complain about weather, but the Yeti’s weather kryptonite is most definitely the heat.
* If you want to see Yeti Vedder sobbing like a baby, just put on the movie Field of Dreams. It gets me every time!
* If they really want to have this Red Sox team quit their bitching and just play ball, they should have a sit down viewing of Field of Dreams. They will leave the room understanding that this whole thing isn’t about them! It is about the game and how great it is. How lucky they should feel that everyday they get to play a kid’s game for huge bucks. Baseball and the fans that pay them are the best thing that ever happened to them. I’m talking to you Josh Beckett! SO RESPECT THE GAME!!!
* For those people who think that Tosh.0 is the funniest show on television, I will never trust your humor judgement!
* Isn’t the whole idea of hair fascinating? For males, it grows on your head first. Then you grow it EVERYWHERE else, but lose it on your head. I still hate my 13-year old self for wanting to shave so badly. He was an IDIOT!
* I bet 13-year old Ice Cube would hate grown up Ice Cube.
* I said OKC in 5. Not looking like such a hot pick right now seeing that they are down 3-1. The night Lebron wins the title (I’m thinking Thursday) will be a horrible night for basketball. I literally turned on game 4 for five minutes. I saw that the refs were making horrible calls and watched Field of Dreams instead. I needed to watch something pure about sports as the NBA refs are almost as horrible as the WWF refs. OH, but WWF refs get paid to be horrible because they are actors, while NBA refs just get paid to be horrible by gamblers!
* Interesting topic that needs to be discussed is if Austin Rivers slides a bit in the draft, do the Celtics take him? Would he want to be coached by his father? Wouldn’t he be the perfect replacement for Ray Allen? The kid can shoot for days! But what if he has a bad game? Does he get grounded? Does he say my dad should have played me more, and not put his cigar out on my arm when I splilled paint in the garage! Oh wait… wait… Yeti is getting the Celtics and the Breakfast Club mixed up again. Do I stutter!
* Speaking of mixing up movies, do you remember when Pacey from the Mighty Ducks scored on a triple deke? Then Emilio Estevez adopted him, and Pacey met a friend named Dawson. Then he slept with Katie Holmes and his school teacher. Talk about a double deke!
* FLYING V!
* Is this whole “Bounty Gate” thing stupid or what? I get trying to protect players, but saying that teams don’t have bounties is just ridiculous. No one cares! I mean, it is the quicker picker upper anyways! Wait… Wait… Wrong Bounty.
* How come if a guy says he is going to a strip club, ladies usually get grossed out, but if a female sees a stripper pole in a public place they must use it?
* So last week I told you about Eliza Dushku’s kickstarter. Here is my plan everyone. I am having my own kickstarter to donate like $20,000 to her kickstarter mainly so Yeti and Eliza can meet and fall in love. I will even let her see Rick Fox on the side as he is a former Laker great and I am sure that, with all of my future kickstarter money, I can land other chicks on the side as well. I’ll start with that cougar Christina Applegate! Was there anyone finer than Married With Children Christina Applegate? Yes! Today’s Christina Applegate! Like a fine wine my friends!
* Do you think that anyone who works at the DMV grew up wanting to be a DMV worker???
* A few weeks ago I said that my favorite band of the last five years was Kings of Leon. I take that back. It is the Avett Brothers.
*Who is the greatest American singer/songwriter ever? I say Bruce Springsteen.
* Wouldn’t it be awesome if Zuckerberg went bankrupt in like 3 years? He probably read this and is sending his Facebook ninja team to get me.
* Where have you gone Bud Bundy, our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.